So, you’re ready to jump back into the dating pool but what exactly do women want from divorced men? Well, a lot. The good news is that women want the same things from all men but as a divorced guy, you’ve got an advantage over the bachelors out there: you’ve been practicing what women want for years.
Although it may seem like signing your divorce papers is the same as signing away your love life, it doesn’t have to be. Some guys think that being divorced is the kiss of death when it comes to romance and relationships but it’s not. It may have been in the past but, luckily for you, times are changing. Divorce is increasingly more common, and women aren’t scared off by it anymore.
Women want commitment.
Maybe it’s a biological thing, or maybe it’s just the way women operate, but we want commitment. What women want to know is that the man we commit to is willing to dedicate himself to us as well. And what shows more commitment than marriage? Okay, your first marriage didn’t last, but the important thing is that you were willing to give it a try. You weren’t afraid to tie yourself to one woman for the rest of your life.
That’s the kind of commitment that women are looking for. I’m not saying you should propose to every woman you date, but just know that you have something she’s looking for. You, much more than your bachelor friends, can offer commitment and be believed. Something to remember: not every woman is looking for marriage, but most are looking for commitment. You can be a great partner without having to remarry.
Women want to be left alone.
Paradoxically, once women have your commitment, we want to be left alone. Don’t get me wrong, we don’t want you to abandon us, but it’s critical that we get our alone time. Maybe that’s time with friends, or maybe it’s truly being alone, but every woman needs a break sometimes. As a divorced guy, you’ve got those breaks built into your schedule already.
You have other commitments outside of your new relationship. You have a family to care for, and during your divorce, you’ve probably built your social life outside of that family. As a divorced guy, you’re in a perfect position. You can spend time with a woman without falling into the trap of hanging on too tightly.
Women want a man, not a God.
Some guys think that no woman will ever date a divorced guy. After all, he clearly has bad judgment and makes major mistakes. That is flat out wrong. Making mistakes is what makes us human, and women want to date humans. Probably the most disastrous thing a guy can do on a date is act like the greatest man in the world. Nobody wants to date someone with a God complex. Confidence may be sexy, but arrogance is anything but.
Women want someone who’s brave.
Admitting that you’ve made a mistake takes an enormous amount of courage. As you know, divorce is not for the faint-hearted. This is another huge advantage you have over the other guys on the field.
Before she’s even met you, a woman who knows you’re divorced knows that you are courageous and don’t shy away from a challenge. She knows that if you end up in a serious relationship, you will be ready for whatever obstacles come your way. It may seem trivial to you, but that piece of mind is priceless to women.
Women want a grown up.
Read any women’s magazine, and you’ll see discussions about men vs. boys. Women want to date men. As a divorced guy, you’re exactly what she wants. A man who has dated someone, proposed to her, married her, and potentially had a family with her is a grown up. That’s the kind of guy that every woman out there is looking for. Grown women have enough going on in their lives without having to look after their boyfriend like he’s a small child.
Women (may or may not) want kids.
Not all women want to have their own kids. If you have children and don’t want anymore, you may be the perfect man for her. Especially if your children are older, or if you have shared custody, there are huge benefits to her forming a relationship with you over anybody else.
Many men want children and women who don’t find it hard to date while being honest about their desires. If a woman dated you, both of you could be honest and get what you wanted.
On the other hand, some women do want kids. A woman may have missed her opportunity to have children but still craves a family and wants to take on a maternal role. Of course, she can’t (and shouldn’t) barge into your family and attempt to replace your kids’ mother but over time, she can get the family she wants through a relationship with a divorced guy. She couldn’t get that with a lifelong bachelor.
What women want the most.
You! It is that simple: women want you. You might think you have nothing to offer as a divorced guy, but you have everything women are looking for. The only thing you might be missing is confidence.
It’s easy for everybody else to see that you’re a catch but you may be struggling to believe it yourself. The problem is that confidence is a big piece of the puzzle. How are you going to build it up? As goofy as it sounds, it’s worth writing down a list of your positive traits. It’s not as hard as you’ll make it out to be. Try asking a trusted friend or family member for a little help if you need it. Review the list daily until you start to believe it.
It’s a little scary, but the best way to build up your dating confidence is just to go on dates. Try to remember that you have exactly what a lot of women want. You are a catch and deserve to have a little fun finding your next relationship. Don’t worry about having a few bad dates – everybody does. Instead, focus on getting out there and see what happens.
Are you surprised by what women want? Let loose in the comments below.
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